My grandmother grew up in this tiny village in Barbados, and she was the only kid in the village to have a cricket bat. She used to play with all the boys, but then they started stealing the bat every time she bought it out of the house and saying that she couldn’t play because girls shouldn’t play sport. So one day she invited them to come play cricket, then set fire to the bat and made them watch it burn, so none of them could play cricket anymore. She was 11.
*rolls up the US constitution and makes the fattest most patriotic blunt ever*
people say when you eat chocolate you break out but i dont see how consuming a hersheys bar is gonna get me out of jail
when you see your reflection on your laptop screen and you just look
get down off your high horse pal. and for god sakes stop letting your horse smoke weed
George R.R. Martin can’t tweet because he’s killed off all 140 characters
i wish i was a mermaid so i could have a nice shiny tail and a pretty seashell bra and a beautiful voice that i could use to entice cute boys and make them crash their ships and drown at sea so human women could rise as the dominate gender of the land